Overcoming Fear and Anxiety

Fear is a powerful human emotion that affects all of us at one time or another. It can be helpful in certain circumstances, like avoiding danger. Unfortunately, it can also be very irrational and quite debilitating. Anyone who has ever suffered with an anxiety disorder or panic attacks can attest to the consequences of uncontrollable fear.

Where does fear come from? Is it something we are born with or is it the result of our circumstances and environment? Why do some people appear to be more “fearful” than others? These are all good questions and depending on who you ask, you are sure to get different answers.

Sociologists argue that fear is an instinct that developed early in primate evolution. It helped less evolved man survive various threats around him – like getting eaten by saber toothed tigers and other hungry predators. Psychologists, on the other hand, suggest that fear is the product of complex, environmental factors. For example, a child that was abandoned by a parent may develop fear and anxiety as he or she matures into adulthood.

There are many answers, but what I discovered was not satisfying for the most part.  So I looked to the Bible for more insight into the source and (hopefully) the solution to this universal, human condition. What I found was intriguing and very insightful.

The very first time “fear” is mentioned in the Bible is in the book of Genesis. From what I can tell, fear is a by-product of sin. When Adam and Eve were first created by God they were naked, felt no shame, and had absolutely nothing to fear. They walked with God in the Garden of Eden and enjoyed all of God’s wonderful creation. They were at perfect harmony with God and the world in which they lived.

Then they sinned and everything changed. Once they ate of the fruit God commanded them not to eat, they realized that they were naked, felt ashamed, and hid from the Lord because they were afraid:

Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the LORD God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the LORD God among the trees of the garden. But the LORD God called to the man, “Where are you?” He answered, “I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid.” (Genesis 3)

From that point forward, man has been plagued with fear. Now it is a natural part of what it means to be human. Fear begins when we are young: The Boogie man in the closet, monsters under the bed, fear and separation anxiety when mommy leaves the house. It doesn’t stop there. Teenagers attending a new High School may be overtaken by fear – new school, fitting in with other kids, and peer pressure. As we get older, our fears grow, but we learn to hide it from others. We fear losing our jobs and not being able to pay the mortgage or rent. Single adults are afraid that they may never meet the “right person” to share love and life with, while married people can be overtaken with fear of infidelity. In our senior years, the fear of illness and death are just about universal. There are as many fears as there are people in the world.  It is everywhere and has little to do with age or circumstance.

That’s the bad news. Fortunately, the Bible also contains some good news. Since fear is the result of sin, it can be cured by fixing our relationship with God.  Sure, psychology and medications can offer some temporary relief from fear and anxiety, but ultimately the solution lies with God. After all, Adam first experienced “fear” when they had sinned.  Therefore, getting right with God is the best cure for this human frailty.

No God -- Know Fear
Know God – No Fear

Once we fix our broken relationship with God, He begins to work in our lives in a mighty way. He removes our fears and worries as we put our trust in His hands. Perhaps that is why Paul exclaimed, “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind” (2 Timothy 1:7).

Peter demonstrated the truth of this statement. As we know from Scripture, he denied the Lord three times because he was afraid of arrest and punishment. However, on the Day of Pentecost, when he received the Holy Spirit, he was immediately transformed and emboldened – unafraid and unashamed! He no longer denied the lord, even to the day of his death. This is the power of God in a Believer’s life.

So what are you afraid of? Have you put your faith and trust in God? He is really the only one that can provide rest from your cares and fears.  As your faith grows, your fears will diminish over time.  Be patient because it is a process.  Ultimately, your life will be transformed by God who gives all who seek Him a spirit of power, love, and a sound mind.  Now that is how you can experience a full, abundant life; unashamed of who you are and unafraid of what's to come!

Thank You Letter to Miley Cyrus

Dear Miley,

I would like to thank you for your recent performance at the VMAs. I realize that you've received a considerable amount of criticism and outrage since then, but I wanted to express my sincere gratitude. Hey, don't get me wrong. I am in no way excusing what you did. I truly did find it disturbing on so many levels. However, I am nevertheless thankful because you have made my parenting job a little easier and confirmed that some of the choices I have made are right on.

I am a Father of a precious young girl that I absolutely adore. Like many parents, I struggle with what to let my daughter watch on TV and listen to on the radio. It’s not always easy to find the right balance so I decided years ago to error on the cautious side of things. I did not let my daughter watch popular programs like Hannah Montana or listen to popular teenage music from Katy Perry. Thankfully, I feel vindicated by my decision to limit my daughter’s exposure after your hyper-sexual, over-the-top performance.

You see, the day after the VMAs, I spoke with several parents who were shocked by your performance. They confided that they did not know how to explain your actions to their teenage daughter that grew up idolizing Hannah Montana. Young girls were confused and parents were a little freaked out.

Fortunately, I didn’t have to explain your performance to my daughter because she wasn’t watching. My daughter’s purity is precious to me, which is why you, Katy Perry, Lady Gaga, and others are not allowed in my home. I don't find it at all amusing when young girls sing, "Put your hands on me in my skin tight jeans, be your teenage dream tonight….yah, yah, yah, let’s go all the way tonight.” That's a "Hell to the no!" in my house.

Please understand that I live by the Christian principle, “Raise up a child in the way he or she should go and when they get old they will not depart from it.” I believe that what goes into a child’s eyes and ears today will come out tomorrow. I know some parents believe that they should be tolerant so their daughter doesn't rebel. Maybe, but if this scripture is true, she will find her way back home if I give her the right direction now.

While I am grateful that you provide a perfect contrast between virtue and vice, I can’t help but feel as though you've sold out (and sold your body) for the shallow lure of fame and fortune. Sadly, You are being used by people in the industry only looking to cash in on your looks and celebrity. Those guys that are filling your head with lies will bail on you when there is no more money to be made. Learn to say "No!" now or you will find yourself washed-up and alone...just another Lindsay Lohan.

I know it is easy to judge your celebrity, but that is not my intent. On some level, I get it. You desperately want to distance yourself from that cute, lovable character you once played on TV. How far are you willing to go to prove that you are not her? Do you even know your limits? I really hope you eventually figure it out. In the meantime, my young daughter’s impressionable mind is off limits!

Again, I thank you because I needed the reassurance that I'm not just an overbearing Christian parent. My concerns are well-founded and I can safely say that you are not the right role model for my daughter.

Sincerely,
Ella's Daddy

Young People Are Leaving The Church

I was greatly dismayed by a recent article in USA Today in which the author described the mass exodus of young people from the Christian church today. It appears that nearly 70% of people between the ages of 20-30 will leave the church. That means that 7 out of 10 young people you see this weekend at church will fall away from their Christian heritage and never return. This is not very encouraging.

So why is this happening at such an alarming rate? The author cites many reasons why. Some leave home for college and are taught that Christianity is a useless vestige of our once parochial heritage. Others simply become disenchanted by the Christian religion altogether as they mature claiming that the church is merely filled with hypocrites and pretenders.

I have my own theory on why young people are bailing on church today. I think it’s because Christianity is no longer real. The modern church is desperately trying to be something it will never be – a clean version of the world. In that sense, we really are pretenders and hypocrites.

As little as 30 years ago, when you walked into a church, there was absolutely no doubt that you were actually in a Christian church. The music was different; the dress was different; and the message was different. There was a real sense of purpose in regards to God, salvation, and right living. Religion was serious business and church services were not casual and light-hearted, but filled with a sense of urgency in turning broken hearts towards God and away from sin.

This is no longer true in our modern, evangelical churches. In the last several decades, we have spent a considerable amount of time and energy trying to make Christianity more attractive by dressing the church up like the world. The music, messages, and social events are all targeted at showing people, particularly young people, that church is cool. What we now have is a church that is merely a “less-fun” alternative to the world. As a result, kids just aren’t interested because it’s fake.

There is no substitute for the truth. In fact, it is the most powerful arsenal in turning hearts to God. This is why Christ declared:

Therefore Jesus said again, “Very truly I tell you, I am the gate for the sheep. All who have come before me are thieves and robbers, but the sheep have not listened to them. I am the gate; whoever enters through me will be saved. They will come in and go out, and find pasture. The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. (John 10)

This is the message our youth need to hear today and it doesn’t need to be attractive; it just needs to be real. Don’t worry, they can handle the truth and if Christ is correct, it’s exactly what they want to hear. Deep down inside, they are not hungry for Christian concerts, fun and games in the park with face painting and game booths, or iPad giveaways.  Those things may be cool and fun, but ultimately they don't quench the fire in our souls.

I know, some of you are saying, “We are just trying to attract people to church, then we give them the true message of Christianity.” Why do we think that we need to make Christianity attractive? Christ wasn’t attractive and his message wasn’t particular pleasing to the listener, but it was sobering to those hearts that recognized their desperate need for a Savior. Christ did not trick his listeners into hearing his message, but they came by the thousands to hear the truth of his words.

Christianity is not “attractive” from the perspective of the world and never will be because it is incompatible with the popular culture. But that’s okay because God doesn’t need us to water down the message so it is pleasing to the ear. And we don’t really need to trick kids into coming to church with gimmicks, concerts, and games. Young people can find plenty of that stuff -- and frankly, much better versions – outside of the church.

So here is a novel idea worth considering. Let’s put our energy into preaching the gospel in love and teaching our kids the sober reality of their fate apart from Christ. Who knows? Maybe, just maybe, they will stick around.

The Curse of the Morning Bun

Every Saturday, I meet a good friend at the local Starbucks for coffee an Christian fellowship.  We like to call our little gathering "Jesus and Java."  We typically order a large coffee and spend a few hours encouraging one another through God's word.  For some strange reason, today I really felt like ordering a morning bun.    It was as if it was calling my name through its glassy encasement.  I gave into temptation and ordered one.

What big mistake. I felt terrible almost immediately.  My blood sugar shot through the roof.  I was shakey and noticed a the early onset of asthma as my chest tightened.  And now, about an hour later, I am terribly lethargic as my body is going through a sugar crash. My only hope is that the fruit and vegetable tonic I whipped up and gulped down will counteract the negative effects of the morning bun curse.

There is a perfectly logical reason why I  feel physically bad.  Like most treats, my morning bun is loaded with sugar.  Foods high in fructose are a major contributing factor to illness in our society today. In fact, no other substance is linked to so many ailments. It is also a major contributor to high-blood pressure, allergies and a weakened immune system, Parkinson's disease, hyperactivity, chronic fatigue.  There are literally hundreds of illnesses linked to diet high in sugar.

And it is not just physical problems, either. Emotional imbalances are also be traced back to a sugary diet. ADHD and hyperactivity in children, anxiety and nervousness, depression, and difficulty concentrating are but a few to consider. Ironically, many people crave sweet treats when they feel lonely or depressed and never realize they are only causing greater emotional stress when they eat that sugar snack intended to make them feel better.   

There is something you can do about it by making a few simple changes, beginning with your diet. It will take some work on your part because sugar is in just about everything and therefore difficult to avoid. We love sweets and manufacturers of foods and drinks add fructose to increase take advantage of our collective sweet tooth. We have now become addicted to sugar. If you crave sweets like me, try eating more fruits to satisfy your sugary urge. Generally speaking, if it grows on a tree or underground, it is good for you (provided you eat it raw).  Diets made up of fruits and vegetables are very low in processed sugar.

There are some practical things you can do as well.  For example, never leave the house unless you are armed with some fruit -- like a peach or an apple.  Keep in mind that when you are hungry your blood sugar drops so you naturally crave sugar.  This can be disastrous, which is why it is important to have fruits and nuts on hand.  When you are shopping, pay attention to the food labels of the things you like to buy and avoid those things high in sugar (it may be disguised as fructose or corn syrup so be careful!).  Breakfast cereals, for example, are typically loaded with sugar and a terrible way to start your day. Of course sodas are among the worst when it comes to sugar content.

Among other types of drinks, alcoholic beverages like wine are also filled with a lot of sugar. This is perhaps one of the contributing factors of alcoholism because our bodies crave sugar and the more we drink, the more we want. A truly vicious cycle. Eliminating sugar from your diet may be hard at first, like anything else you try. Your body is accustomed to sugar so it is going to take a little time to detox. Stick with it for at least 30 days and I promise that you will feel better. Everyday it will be easier as you commit to eating healthier and see and feel results. You will have more energy, lose weight, and experience better health overall. Improved health will lead to an improved emotional state.

I am thankful for the curse of the morning bun.  This experience is a strong reminder why I made significant dietary changes several years ago. Today I can confidently say that it is going to be a long time before I eat another morning bun!  I hope this will inspire you to make some changes in your diet as well.

May God bless you as you pursue the abundant life!

CA Legislation May Result in Unintended Consequences

California law-makers passed sweeping legislation on Monday that allows trans-gender students to decide which bathrooms they would like to use and whether to play on boy or girl sports teams depending on their trans-gender status.  This is now the law in California for public schools.

When Governor Brown signed the controversial bill, he indicated that he did so to help prevent bullying of students who are trans-gender.  As a result, all children who attend public school will be impacted.

I understand the good intentions of those who submitted, supported, and passed this bill.  Bullying is a big problem and anything that we can do as a society to stop it has my full support. However, I truly wonder if this is really going to help? Furthermore, I am concerned about the unintended consequences of this sweeping and far-reaching legislation.  How will this affect boys that will be required to wrestle trans-gender girls in wrestling competitions?  Will girls feel uncomfortable and possibly even embarrassed to change in the girls locker room next to a trans-gender boy?

There are many more examples that come to mind, which is why I wonder if this bill was thought through from every possible perspective? To be sure, we don't want to cause further harm to the very children we are attempting to protect.

I realize that this is a sensitive issue on all sides and emotions can escalate quickly. Nevertheless, it is an important issue because it inolves our children. That is why it is important to discuss it openly by asking the simple question, "Will this help or hurt our children?"

Words of Wisdom from Mike Tyson

Mike Tyson is many things -- former heavy champion of the world, convicted rapist, recovering drug addict, stage actor in a one-man show, and even a philosopher of sorts.  When Tyson was on top of the world as heavy weight champion, he was asked how he was so easily able to thwart the well thought-out plans of veteran fighters.  Tyson simply replied, "Everybody has a plan until they get punched in the face." 

True that, Mike.  This golden nugget of wisdom has deep and profound implications in life.  Jesus taught a similar lesson in the parable of the Rich Fool.  In this parable, he spoke of a man who tended crops that yielded an abundant harvest.  The future looked bright so the young man thought to himself, "This is what I’ll do.  I will tear down my barns and build bigger ones, and there I will store my surplus grain" (Luke 12:18).  Then he sat back to count his money and eat, drink, and live the merry life.  Little did he realize that he would lose his life that very night and never realized his great plans of wealth and prosperity. 

All of us make plans and hope things will go a particular way, like the young man storing up treasures or a fighter in the ring facing a fierce foe.  Unfortunately, life has a way of punching us in the face and sometimes really, really hard.  When that happens, all of our plans fly out the window.  If we are not able to absorb life's blows, we'll find ourselves flat on the mat wondering what the heck happened; just like many of the fighters that entered the ring against Tyson early in his career (later in his career he was more of a freak-show than a fighter). 

Mike Tyson eventually lost his heavy-weight title to Buster Douglas, a fighter absolutely no one gave much a chance to win.  He almost didn't win.  Buster was knocked on his can at the end of the Eighth round.  Fortunately, he was able to clear the cobwebs and get back on his feet.  Several rounds later he knocked Mike out.  He was victorious.

Are you prepared for life's blows?  You can bet they are coming.  You are going to get a little bloody at some point and may need to change your plans due to circumstances that are completely out of your control.   But hang-in there and don't give up.  Get back on your feet and keep swinging!  You will be victorious as well if you are willing to deal with life on its terms rather than trying to make it fit into yours.

My Pizza God

Thanks to a strong recommendation from a good friend, my family and I tried a new pizza place over the weekend.  It's not your ordinary pizza joint.  Kinda like Chipotle, but without the burrito.  You make your pizza anyway you want.   You get to choose the type of bread, sauce, cheese, and toppings.  It's fantastic!

It's also very popular.  The line was nearly to the door and more and more people poured in the entire time we were there on Sunday.  As I wolfed my pizza-pie down my face, I couldn't help but wonder why it was so popular?  Maybe it's just a novelty that will wear off soon. 

I think it has to do with the fact that ultimate control is in the hands of the guy ordering.  You basically get to make your pizza anyway you want!  We love to be in control and this pizza concept feeds not only the stomach, but also the ego. 

But this blog isn't about pizza. 

This experience reminds me of something much more important.  It has to do with God....or how we "make" God the way we want him to be.  It's no longer fashionable to order the God off the Bible menu.  Nah, we want to make him according to our own, personal recipe.  Sure, we may choose some toppings from the Bible.  You know, the stuff like, "God is a God of love" and tasty stuff like that. 

But like strong garlic or sardines on our pizza, the idea that God expects something from us in return we can simply do without such nonsense.  Yes, God today for most is a god that is made from various teachings, ideas, and the imagination of the beholder.  He, she, it, or whatever is just the way we want him, her, or it to be.

This is not a new phenomenon.  It's as old as the Bible itself.  One of the most beloved characters of the New Testament is John the Baptist.  He was a rockstar in his day.  People travelled from all over Judea to visit the crazy man dressed in animal skins, eating locust, and screaming to all who would listen, "Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand" (Matt. 3:2). 

John was convinced that his mission was to prepare the way of the Lord so he gave up everything to fulfill his mission.  He was certain that he would look directly into the face of God before he died. 

Then, one day, it happened.  John met the Lord..  Here is the narrative of one gospel writer who recorded the encounter:

The next day John saw Jesus coming toward him and said, “Look, the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world!   This is the one I meant when I said, ‘A man who comes after me has surpassed me because he was before me.’  I myself did not know him, but the reason I came baptizing with water was that he might be revealed to Israel.” (John 1)

John met the Lord face to face on that day and knew instantly that Christ was God.  If anyone was sold out for God it had to be John, right?  After all, John gave up his life to follow Jesus. 

This is not exactly true.  Just a short time after meeting Christ, John sent some of his disciple to ask Jesus, " Are you the one who is to come, or should we expect someone else?" (Matthew11:2)

I guess Jesus let him down. 

John, like the rest of us, had a preconceived view of who he thought God was.  He was expecting a liberator, not a suffering servant.  He expected a king.  He expected Christ to be a lot of things, but when Jesus did not live up to his expectations he questioned whether he was even God. 

Sure, we can make a pizza anyway we fancy.  God, however, is not made according to our liking.  You see, it really doesn't matter what we believe about God.  He is.  Period.  He existed before there were any views about what and who he is and he will exist longer after we walk this earth.  God is dependent upon no one or no thing.  That's what it means to be God.

So what is your view on God?  Do you accept him for who he is or do you insist on re-making him the way you like?