Monday, February 18, 2013

Making Your Years Count

It's President's Day and on a day when we celebrate many of our great presidents I thought I would share a little something from my favorite president -- Abraham Lincoln.  President Lincoln is credited with many incredible and wonderful achievements, including ending slavery and reuniting a broken country.  These achievements, however, are not what I am going to share today.  Instead, I am going to recite a quote I recently read from the former President:
"It's not the years in your life that count, it's the life in your years that count."
Although only one sentence, this quote speaks volumes to me.  Life is not just about living many years, but it's about making the most of the years you have been given.  Yes, how we live our life is so much more important than living a long life. 

It begins with our choices.  Let me explain what I mean.  For the most part, what we do in life has everything to do with what we choose to do.  This is sometimes hard to understand because not every choice has an immediate impact on our lives.  For example, choosing to go to college may not show any tangible benefits for 4 years (or in my case, 6 years.  Yes, I was able to cram 4 years of college into 6 years).

Of course, going to college is a big decision and not every decision may be that dramatic.  However, all of our choices add up over time.  Every minute of your life is critical.  Choosing to watch 2 hours of TV tonight may mean you will miss out on doing something more significant, like learning a new song on the piano, writing another chapter of your book, or spending time with a dear friend who needs your encouragement. 

So I am learning that making the most of every opportunity is key in living a full, productive life in every area -- from relationships to spirituality.    I have a long way to go in learning this important life-lesson.   Another great man, St. Paul, has inspired me as well in this regard:
So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise.  Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days. Don’t act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do. Don’t be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, be filled with the Holy Spirit, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs among yourselves, and making music to the Lord in your hearts.  And give thanks for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.  (Eph. 5:15-20)
I glean from this passage that I should never  waste the precious moments that have been given to me.  Wise words indeed and an encouargement to me to choose the time I spend thoughtfully.  I hope that you have been encouraged as well.  Make the most of every opportunity and you will truly discover that it is not just about the years in your life, but the life in your years that really count!

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Friday, February 8, 2013

Embracing Change

I begin a new job this Monday. There is always a certain amount of anxiety and hesitation associated with something new.  Despite my nerves, I'm really looking forward to this new challenge because I know with every challenge in life there is great opportunity.  I know, however, that in order to truly experience all that this new job has to offer I must let go of the past.

This experience reminds me a lot of our spiritual journey in life. God is always on the move. He is constantly working His "master plan." Jesus noted this when he said, "My Father is always at his work to this very day, and I, too, am working" (John 5:17).

God's plan often involves us as His children. Keeping step with God may require that we let go of the past and embrace what is new. In my case, it is a new job that will involve making new friends, building relationships with people I have never met, perhaps learning a new skill, and definitely being challenged in ways I had not yet previously imagined.

I heard a great quote the other day that went something like this: "You cannot embrace the new thing God is doing in your life if you hang on to the past." This is really true. As new creations in Christ, we are asked to let go of the past so we can enjoy the future in God's kingdom.
But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me. No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us. (Phil. 3:13,14)
What is God calling you to do? It may not be a new job, but He may be leading you into a new opportunity of your own.  Perhaps it is time to clean out the closet and let go of those old clothes that you will never wear.  Maybe it is time to jump into a new ministry or even attend a new church.  Maybe you are stuck in an unhealthy relationship that you know God is asking you to end. God may be asking you to make other significant life decisions like quitting smoking cigarettes or eliminating alcohol.  You may have considered having a child but you are unsure because of social or financial pressures that pale in comparison to the joy and blessing with raising children. 

There are any number of decisions on your horizon, but they involve change.  So are you open to change or are you still clinging to the past?  This "new thing" God is asking you to do may require that you grab onto it with both hands so let go of the past!

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Monday, October 8, 2012

He will give us all things!

I was recently asked “How come you are so positive?” The question was probably the result of curiosity mixed with a twinge of irritation. Yes, I admit that I am a very positive person overall. I definitely see life through rose colored glasses.

The reason I am so incredibly optimistic has everything to do with my confidence in the Lord. I have absolutely no doubt that God is in control of every circumstance that I face. There are no random events in my life. Everything is meticulously planned according to God’s sovereign will and good pleasure.
If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? (Romans 8:31)
God gave his son so that whoever believes in him would have everlasting life. I rejoice in this gift of life. Therefore, I am confident in every circumstance because God’s love did not stop on the Cross. When I face trials in my life, I know that God will provide what I need, when I need it. He will graciously provide all of my daily needs according to his will. After all, if God gave his Son to redeem me from my sin, I trust that he will give me “all things!” So I am positive and optimistic. I am happy, content, and filled with great satisfaction.…

This has been a journey for me. I have to confess that it has taken more than 25 years of walking with the Lord to comprehend the depth of his love. The life I live is now one lived by faith. I cannot possibly see what is ahead nor can I say with certainty that there will not be great trials and challenges in my future. I am convinced, however, that absolutely nothing can separate me from God’s great love:
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:31,38-39)
If you’re facing struggles in your life I hope that you can draw from God’s promises in Romans 8. He gave his Son for you and will also graciously give you all things required for life and happiness. Have faith in God and trust that he is in control of every circumstance in your life. Most of all, believe that absolutely nothing will separate you from his great love!

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Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Accentuate the Positive

In the 1940s crooner Bing Crosby recorded “Accentuate the Positive” and it became an instant classic.  The song was originally written by Johnny Mercer who was inspired by a charismatic speaker who exhorted his listeners to focus on the positive rather than the negative.  I love this song because it has a wonderful message.  Here is Bing singing this song with the Andrew Sisters.


This is much more than just a song.  I believe that our lives are truly enriched when we truly accentuate the positive.   Positive people experience a great deal more happiness and overall satisfaction than those who are negative and pessimistic.  They are healthier and live a longer, healthier life studies show.

Positive thinking people are generally more thankful as well.  Thankfulness is a beautiful quality that brings peace to a restless soul.  It is an ability to see what is good even in the midst of trial and great adversity.  Those who are thankful can rejoice in God’s grace and mercy:  “Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe…” (Hebrews 12:28).  Because we are God’s children we can rejoice and be truly thankful indeed.

Positive people are optimistic about their lives and possibilities for blessing and success.  They are able to see beyond what some believe they “cannot do” and focus instead on what is possible!  They achieve great things and shape the world in positive, creative ways.  They live their dreams and overcome their greatest fears and disappointments. 

Happiness, thankfulness, and optimism are just a few of the reasons why it is important to accentuate the positive.  Certainly the world has a fair amount of negativity, but that does not mean that you have to dwell on it.  Make it your goal this week to look at the positive because there is always something good in every situation. Sometimes you have to search for it.  Just remember, “You’ve got to accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative.  And latch on to the affirmative, don’t mess with Mister In-Between.”  Live the words of this song and your life will be more satisfying and rewarding! 


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Sunday, September 30, 2012

Benefits of Prayer and Meditation

Prayer and meditation are an integral part of a full, abundant life.  When done on a regular basis, it has been shown to lower blood pressure, reduce cholesterol, relieve anxiety and depression, and increase happiness and overall well-being.  You will definitely experience a greater sense of calm and peace in a very short time.  Best of all, it enhances your relationship with God and ability to discern His perfect will for your life. 

The benefits are well worth a few minutes a day.  If you are considering making this a habit, here  are some things to consider to get the most out of your intimate time with God:
  1. Find a quiet place
  2. Eliminate the negative and focus on the positive
  3. Surrender to the Lord
  4. Listen to His Word
Find a Quiet Place
It is important to find a quiet place and eliminate all distractions before you enter into deep prayer.  This is a time for just you and Lord.  There must be a sense of serenity and solitude that promotes peace and calm.  Jesus understood that this was a necessary requirement of a healthy prayer life.  He would often "withdraw" from the crowds and his close friends.  This became especially true when his popularity grew, "Yet the news about him spread all the more, so that crowds of people came to hear him and to be healed of their sicknesses.   But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed" (Luke 5:15,16).  Like Jesus, you also need to find a quiet, peaceful place void of the TV, radio, cell phone, and screaming kids.
 
This is hard to do in our busy world, but absolutely necessary.  Find a quiet room or outside place like the backyard or park area.  You may need to work at being alone, but be creative if necessary.  Even your car can  be a place of solitude so consider all options.   

Meditation should not be combined with another activity, like taking a walk, working out at the gym, or driving in your car.  You will need to be still and focused to enter into a deep, meditative state.
 
Eliminate the Negative and Focus on the Positive
Meditation is not a time to dwell on past mistakes and personal inadequacies.  It is really about looking to God and seeking his will for your life.  Therefore, eliminate those negative thoughts that often create a sense of hopelessness and focus on those things that are positive and encouraging.  Consider the words of Paul, "Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things" (Philippians 4:8). 
 
Purge the negative and allow your thoughts to be consumed with all that is good, holy, and pure.  Meditate on God's sovereignty and power.  Remember, God is with you and desires that you experience life abundantly.  And if He is for you, there isn't anything that can possibly be against you!
 
Surrender to the Lord
Peace comes through absolute surrender to the Lord of heaven and earth.  It requires letting go of what is troubling you and embracing God and His will.  By approaching prayer and meditation with this frame of mind, you will feel a sense of relief and calm because you are trusting in God rather than relying on your own strength to fix problems in your life.  After all, God knows your pain and sorrow and wants to be the rock you lean upon.  Therefore, cast your burdens on him: 
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:6,7)
Take your requests to God and experience sweet, wonderful peace.  Find refreshing in the Lord!
 
Listen to His Word
Prayer and meditation is not a "tool" to convince God that He should do what we ask.  Rather, it is a time of seeking His divine will. Empty your mind of your cares and troubles an ask God to speak to you and share His will for you.  This can be done by including the Bible in your daily prayer:
My son, keep my words and store up my commands within you.  Keep my commands and you will live; guard my teachings as the apple of your eye.  Bind them on your fingers; write them on the tablet of your heart. (Proverbs 7:1-3)
Yes, write His word on the tablet of your heart and you will hear His voice as He speaks to you.  Reciting His word will become a natural part of your prayers and meditations.  It will also direct your thoughts as you focus on what is true and holy.  The truth will set you free of the trials you now face!



Lastly, set aside 5 minutes a day for prayer and meditation.  The benefits are enormous when you practice this on a daily basis.  Studies have even shown that there are profound changes in the brain that results in greater peace and happiness.  You will feel better physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

With so many incredible benefits and so little effort, why not get started today!

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Thursday, September 27, 2012

Feeling Overwhelmed?

In the hustle and bustle of modern life, it is easy to become overwhelmed.  There just doesn't seem to be enough time in the day to do everything that we hope to accomplish.  As a result, people are tired, frustrated, and stressed out.  If this sounds familiar, you may be trying to do too much.  Fortunately, there is hope!  I'll share some things you can do to better manage your time and recover your sanity.

There are a limited amount of hours in the day so it is important to focus on the really important things in life.  To illustrate why it is important to prioritize, consider the Biblical example of two sisters in Luke 10 who were blessed by a visit from Jesus.  The sisters responded to his visit differently.  Mary immediately sat at his feet and listened intently to everything he had to say.  Martha, on the other hand, “was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made.”  She should have been spending time with the Lord instead:  
“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one.  Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”  (Luke 10:41,42).
We all have a little Martha inside of us.  And like Martha, we grow impatient and stressed out because we are working hard on the wrong things.   Some parents, for example, are so busy running their children around from one extracurricular activity to another that they are completely overwhelmed.  Their week is a blur.  Soccer games all weekend with mandatory practices throughout the week for little Johnny and piano and ballet lessons for Jane.  It can get to the point that mom and dad "divide and conquer" because each child has a different activity at conflicting times and the family is separated for long periods of time.

There is certainly nothing wrong with soccer, ballet, or piano.  In fact the benefits can be enormous.  However, playing soccer is not a necessity and in some cases may simply be overwhelming for those families with a lot of things going on.  It can also deprive the family of more important activities that promote a higher quality of life and family unity. 

Since time is a precious commodity, all of us must focus time and energy on what is really important.  Here is something that I recommend to help.  Get a piece of paper and label three columns with the headings – ‘Stuff to Do’, ‘Importance’, and ‘Priority’.  Now think about everything you would like to do or have planned over the next few days or weeks and write them down on your list (order is not important at this time).  Once you have written down everything you can think of, go to the column labeled ‘Importance’ and label each item as either, ‘Must Do’, ‘Should Do’, or ‘Nice to Do’. 

The goal is to identify those things that really need to get done and separate out less important tasks.  Generally speaking, approximately 1/3 of the items on your list should be absolutely necessary.  If all of your items are 'Must Do' than you are either the President of the United States (if this is you, I would like to thank you Mr. President for reading my little blog) or you may be obsessing over things that really are not critical but you believe they are.  You are probably not the President so review the list to determine if what you've labeled as ‘Must Do’ is really a "must do."  If the consequences are not significant, like paying the mortgage, eating, preparing for surgery, or taking little Johnny to school on time, then the activity is probably a 'Nice to Do' rather than a 'Must Do'.

Now that your list is complete, it is time to prioritize each within each category.  Label the “Must Do” with a A1, A2, A3, etc. and the “Should Do’ items with a B1, B2, B3, and finally the ‘Nice to Do’ items as C1, C2, C3, etc.  At this point you will have identified all of the things you want to do, their importance, and the priority. 

You may be saying to yourself, "I don't have time to make a list!"  You'll find that it really does not take that long and you'll quickly realize the benefits.  I can tell you that this process helped me achieve balance in my life and reduce stress.  I have a great many interests, but not enough time.  So it is necessary for me to focus on what is really important -- family, marriage, faith, health, and work are at the top of my list.  Other things simply have to wait. 

For example, I love old cars and have a beautiful 57 Chevy in my garage that is 90% restored.  I would love to finish it and cruise the boulevard on Saturday, but in the grand scheme of things it is not a priority in my life right now.   It is a 'Nice to Do'.   On occassion I work on it, but only when the Must/Should Do items on my list are complete and I have the energy. 

I'm sure many of you reading this can cerainly  relate to the above.   There may be things that you enjoy doing that are simply not that important compared to others.  Prioritize and conquer.  If you get through all of the 'Must Do' and 'Should Do' items on your list, you will feel a great sense of accomplishment and you won't feel guilty working on the 'Nice to Do' items.    You will be more organized and filled with a tremendous sense of power and control. Best of all, you will actually accomplish more because you are not overwhelmed!

Lastly, remember to keep your list up-to-date.  This is not a one-time activity but on-going task because priorities in life change over time.  Commit to this every day so you remain focused on what is really important and eliminate those things that only add to your stress and frustration.

Best of luck!

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Sunday, September 23, 2012

Buying Happiness

My parents used to tell me, "Ken, it is better to give than to receive."  As a selfish kid, I thought that was merely a clever ruse or excuse for not buying me something I wanted.  It turns out that they were right!  Research confirms that we find greater joy and happiness when we spend our money to bless others.  

A study was conducted on employees who received an annual bonus to determine how spending this windfall affected their happiness.  They were asked to record what percentage of their bonus was spent on 1) bills and expenses, 2) rent or mortgage, 3) buying something for themselves, 4) buying something for someone else, 5) donating to charity, and 6) other.   Their happiness was measured prior to receiving their bonus and then again approximately 6-8 weeks later.  Employees who spent more of their money on charities and other people reported greater joy and happiness than those who did not. 

In another other study, students were given $20 to spend.  Half of the students were told to spend the money on something that they wanted.  The others were instructed to spend the money on other people.  The researchers checked-in with the participants after the money was spent and the second group reported greater happiness and satisfaction overall.  They were blessed when they blessed others.

These studies (and countless others) prove that "giving" is truly very rewarding.  This may seem counter-intuitive in our narcissistic culture that promotes self-indulgence and relentless pursuit of stuff.  “Do something nice for yourself” is a popular slogan today. The reality is that when we “do something nice” for other people, we experience greater fulfillment in life!

This is true because generosity, kindness, and charity are virtues that really do lead to blessing and happiness.  It not only feels good to do something for another person, but there is a spiritual blessing that comes from giving generously:
Give generously to the poor, not grudgingly, for the LORD your God will bless you in everything you do.  (Deuteronomy 15:10)
Yes, when you bless other people you are blessed in return.  It brings joy to God’s heart and we reap the benefits of His blessing.  The really cool thing is that you don’t have to spend a fortune to feel really good.  It can be as little as a dollar or two; provided you're spending it on another person.

I recently passed a homeless man while driving down a busy street.  My heart was broken so I pulled into the nearest drive-thru and bought food to offer him.  I’ll never forget his smile as I handed him a taco six-pack.  The cost of the tacos was insignificant, but the smile on his face was priceless.  And you know, my heart was glad because I spent a little money on someone else for a change. 

All of us have similar opportunities…. we just need to look for them.  You may have a friend who needs a little encouragement.  Buy them a card that expresses your love and write a few words of kindness to lift his or her spirits.  Perhaps your wife is overwhelmed by raising the children.  Give her a long-stem rose or small gift from the dollar store to express your thankfulness.  Maybe your daughter had a hard day at school.  Cheer her up with an ice cream cone to help her forget the cares of the day. Seek and you shall find many other opportunities to bless. 

It really does feel good to think of others first.  Spending money on gifts for others or supporting a needy charity is a small investment in happiness and well worth the payoff.   It doesn’t cost much to brighten another person's day.  And best of all, your day will be made that much brighter proving that you really can buy happiness!

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